A Look Back

Kerr Family Trip 2008 from Justin Kerr on Vimeo.

Answers to the Marshmallow 101 Quiz

1) My wife, the Domestic Goddess
2) Princess Buttercup
3) Princess Get Er Done
4) Me
5) Baby
6) Tater
7) W Bear

Home Again

We arrived back home yesterday afternoon and spent the better part of three hours unpacking the RV. Oy vey. Who would have thought you could accumulate so much cra... um, stuff in just two weeks? Today we cleaned the RV for its return tomorrow and have been re-assembling our house in order to get back into a "normal" routine.

I have to admit, I'm going to miss being on the road. I kept trying to stretch out the trip yesterday by pointing out every possible diversion, "Look honey, a yard sale!" Look kids, an ice cream stand!" "Hey, a UFO!" I've already started thinking about the next trip: where to go, what to see, which bank to knock over to finance the trip.

As I look back over the 500+ photos, it seems as if we've been gone a long time. We covered close to 4000 miles and traveled through 14 states. There's a lot of open space out there beyond the borders of New England. We saw a good piece of it and met some great people along the way.

I'm looking forward to our next road trip in September when the family will be heading down to North Carolina. We'll be in the mini-van for that trip and I'm sure it will seem a bit more cramped. But at least I won't have to dump any waste tanks.

-Justin

Marshmallow Toasting 101

Each member of my family has their own method for toasting marshmallows. See if you can guess which family member uses which method.
-Justin

1) Slowly toasts the marshmallow above the fire to a perfect light golden brown then peels off the outer layer and re-toasts the molten center still on the stick.

2) Sacrifices three or four marshmallows in the fire before finally coming up with one just right. Usually falls way behind in the smore count.

3) Thrusts the marshmallow into the center of the camp fire, immolating it beyond recognition.

4) Doesn't really care for marshmallows but toasts one anyway to participate in the family tradition.

5) Grabs marshmallows straight from the bag and stuffs as many as they can into their mouth before anyone notices.

6) Whines until someone toasts the marshmallow for them.

7) Puts their marshmallow over the fire, zones out and then pulls out a burnt stick, wondering where the marshmallow went.

Kerr Family Trip 2008 Awards

As we wind down our vacation in the Newburg, NY KOA (motto: welcome to NY, now empty your wallet) I've been reflecting on our journey and some of the things we've seen and done. Here are the awards for best, worst and most unusual.
-Justin

Best Soundtrack
"Go" by the Newsboys (wherever we go, dat's where da party's at!)

Most Picturesque Scenery
Shenandoah Valley, VA

Favorite Road Food
Jack Links Teriyaki Flavored Beef Jerky

Favorite Road Game
20 Questions (Best player-Princess Git Er Done)

Most Unusual Game
Road Kill Count

Most Fun Excursion
Hershey's Chocolate World

Scariest KOA
Tulsa, OK

Best KOA
Elizabethtown, PA

Best Catfish & Hush Puppies
Cock of the Walk Restaurant, Nashville

Worst Detour
Route 250 near the OH and WV border

Best Impulsive Stop
Lincoln's Homestead Cabin, IL

Worst Impulsive Stop
KFC Buffet

Most Frequent Stop
(tie) Wally World and Starbucks

Best Shutterbugs
(tie) Princess Buttercup and Princess Git Er Done

Worst Swimmer
Baby

Rarest License Plate
Utah

Best Discovery
Finding we had an extra day of travel available to us

Worst Discovery
Dumping the waste tanks in sandals

Best Time of Day
Arriving at camp early

Worst Time of Day
Arriving at camp late

Favorite Non-Human Traveling Companion
Francois the GPS

Best Meal
Good & Plenty, Smokehouse, PA

Worst Meal
KFC Buffet, Virginia

Nicest Waitress
Dana at Granite City, MO Waffle House

Evil Plan Exposed (aka Lunch)

I have discovered a nefarious plan for world domination right here in the US. It is now my firm belief that the Pennsylvania Dutch are going to subjugate the world. How will they do this? Through a restaurant known as the Good & Plenty. Yes, I know it sounds innocent but don't let the name fool you. Allow me to tell you how I discovered this.

On our way out of Elizabethtown, we decided to drive through the Pennsylvania Dutch area. After visiting a replica of the Tabernacle, we were looking for a place to eat that would serve local food. We didn't come all this way to eat at McDonald's. We found a family style restaurant owned by a lovely Mennonite couple and decided to give it a try.

We were seated at tables about 20 feet long. Already on the table was rhubarb compote, chow chow, peppered cabbage, cottage cheese, whipped butter and apple butter. I should have realized what was in store. Our charming waitress, Cindy, came over with a plate of fresh baked white and whole wheat bread. Five minutes later, the gastronomic attack began. Cindy returned with huge bowls of fried chicken, roasted pork with sauerkraut, roast beef, sweet corn, stuffing, peas, mashed potatoes, gravy, and noodles. There was enough food to feed a football team. Baby of course rose to the challenge by standing up in his high chair and putting his plate out for Cindy to fill.

Now, there's some PSYOPS going on here. First of all, the sign says "all you can eat" so your brain automatically goes into "I haven't been fed in weeks" mode rather than staying in rational human mode. Second, it's a bit pricey so you feel obligated to eat your money's worth. Third, as Princess Buttercup confirmed with Cindy, it's all thrown out if you don't eat it so there's a measure of "I don't want to waste food!" as well. And to make sure you'll make a pure USDA choice pig out of yourself, they give you a sweet waitress who's like your mom and asks, "Can I get you anything else? Are you sure? I'd be glad to get you something."

So we ate. And we ate. And when we couldn't eat another bite, Cindy said, "Let me get you your dessert!" She returns with a bowl of orange jello, coconut cream pudding, and two pies! Two Pies! You sadists!! The she mentions those two magic words that instantly over ride any common sense left: ice cream.

By this time we were food stupid. But we ate dessert anyway and became food comatose. We couldn't think a coherent thought if some one did it for us. We were so stuffed that 3:00 Disco Hour was cancelled due to digesting. And that's when it occurred to me. Thousands and thousands of people walk into Good & Plenty each year; normal sensible people. After a meal there, they leave as zombies, unable to do more than stagger around repeating "Wow, I'm stuffed." What great way to conquer the world. I know for a fact that they sucked out my brains while we ate because as we left, stuffed as we were, we still bought whoopie pies in their bakery.

The fiends.

Hello from Happiness

After a minor miscommunication with the car rental people (new slogan- "Enterprise! We Let You Down!"), we took off for Hershey, PA about 10:00 this morning. 

For those of you who have never been, it's not just a factory, it's an entire town built by Milton Hershey and his foundation. There's a library, a zoo, a golf course/resort area, an amusement park, the factory and a place called Chocolate World which was created to take the place of tours of the actual factory. We went to Chocolate World because we didn't feel like spending $180.00 to get all seven of us into the amusement park. We took a small ride through Chocolate World which showed how chocolate is made, and then a trolley ride through town. The trolley was good because it wasn't just a ride with someone droning on about buildings. The guide and another person sang and acted out parts and made the trip entertaining.

After a quick lunch, we hit the gift shop. What ill-informed lunkhead decided to take five overeager kids to a humongous chocolate store?!? Oh yeah, me. I was actually surprised that they didn't carry anything different than what could be found in a regular grocery store.  I thought here at Mecca, you would be able to buy the chocolate at a discount or see variations that they were testing (I've had orange flavored Kit Kats that were to die for). Alas, the same stuff.  This however, did not keep us from filling our basket.  We've been told that there is an M&M factory nearby but they don't give tours.  Perhaps that's just as well (Mrs. Kerr?  Please get your head off the conveyor belt.  Mrs. Kerr?  Please stop eating.)

Now we are back at camp and, after telling the kids for the past two days that we will have time to swim when we get to Hershey, THEY CLOSE THE POOL BECAUSE IT'S TOO COLD. But I'm ok because I have a big bag o'chocolate. So we played mini-golf instead. Princess Buttercup asked for a golf ball that matched her outfit. And she wonders why we call her Buttercup.

Tonight we finally made s'mores so our RV trip can be authentic. 'Cause you know, it ain't real 'til the fire's going and the s'mores come out.  It was a lovely time, hanging by the fire with the cherubs making yummy snacks. Bo mentioned that in two more nights we'd be home and I was actually sad about it.  All this wandering around and seeing new things has been a lot of fun. Despite 14 days on the road with five kids in this tin can, Bo and I are talking about when the next trip should be.  If only someone would pay me for being nomadic.....

Pictures!

Elizabethtown, PA

This has been a WallyWorld free day!

The problem with hours and hours of driving and chatting with the Bo Hunkmeister is that we start to develop a lot of jokes between us that we just find hysterical but are hard to explain to others. For example:

• Bolatte Hunkaccino
  
• Hush Puppies with crack sauce
  
• Nava-hoe! (we're mocking a truck company with an unfortunate sense of corporate identity)

See, I'm about ready to wet myself from laughing and I bet the rest of you are scratching your heads and wondering if I've fallen off my meds.

Ok, moving on from the obscure and uninteresting....

This morning, I asked the family what their most favorite part of the trip and least favorite part of the trip was so far. I thought the results were interesting.

Bo
favorite parts: time with the kids, 3:00 pm karaoke hour
least favorite parts: when the kids fuss and need discipline, monkey butt

Raven
favorite parts: watching the scenery go by, eating out
least favorite part: getting in late to camp and everyone (including me) is fussy

Princess Buttercup
favorite part: everything! (which means she can't make up her mind)
least favorite part: can't think of one

Princess Git Er Done
favorite part: swimming
least favorite part: getting into the deep end of Grandpa's pool

W. Bear
favorite part: Little Rock KOA pool
least favorite part: falling into Grandpa's pool

Tater
favorite part: Little Rock KOA pool
least favorite part: falling into Grandpa's pool
(Tater sometimes has difficulty coming up with his own ideas)

Baby
favorite part: running around, honking the car horn early in the morning
least favorite part: being in the car seat, being told he can't drive

What to do on a rainy night...

Watch the Addams Family tv show on Daddy's laptop!